me mums not my god are you stupid ?

(Source: plasticbagvevo, via hotboyproblems)

the-vashta-nerada:

ALRIGHT SO IT’S 2:30 IN THE MORNING AND I WAS JUST ABOUT TO FALL ASLEEP AND  THEN I SAT UP AND ALMOST SCREAMED BECAUSE I WAS STRUCK WITH REALIZATION AND I DISCOVERED THE ULTIMATE TRUTH OF THE UNIVERSE

TELETUBBIES ARE CALLED TELETUBBIES BECAUSE THEY HAVE TELEVISIONS IN THEIR STOMACHS

no shit

(via crystallized-teardrops)

how do fourteen year olds get pregnant, I can’t even get a high five from a guy

(Source: aiiimeeee, via crystallized-teardrops)

rip-homegirl:

im saving myself for 1994 leonardo dicaprio

(via pistache-vanille)

(Source: joydick, via majorvirgin)

I hate when a baby is born because all the adults are like “fuck the existing children, grandchildren, nieces and nephews”,”there is a baby here who has 0% intelligence, let’s give them all of our attention even if it’s not out child and we have children who need us and need someone to talk to and be with. But hey fuck you 1st born, this baby will get all the attention you crave.

sleepover. more like finding out you really hate your friends.

did you know that bashing my music taste increases your chances of changing my opinion by 0%

(Source: exhaledoom, via orgasm)

sprouseable:

😂